Friday, June 26, 2009

Feeling better

I almost hate to put Feeling Better as my title here on this post because I know that some people will read that as : she's cured" .

So here's a little lingo for you non MS'ers. If I say I feel okay, I really feel like crap.
If I say I feel like crap, I really really feel like crap. See the difference.

If I tell you the truth when I'm having a bad day I'm a whiner.
If I tell you feel great You think I'm cured.
There is no cure so please assume I always feel like crap and then let me pretend I feel okay.

Sheesh !
I was suppose to have PT yesterday but I cancelled. It was the third straight day of temps being close to 95 degrees and I was feeling exhausted. I actually felt a little dehydrated.

So I decided to get some stuff done around the house. 5 loads of laundy. ( all the new clothes we bought the other day)
I adopted two new soldiers so I wrote a letter to both of them introducing myself. These soldiers are probably #15 and #16 I have adopted since the war began. Doesn't make a difference what your beliefs are about the war I just believe we need to support our troops so I adopt them and send them stuff while they are there.

I cleaned thehouse a bit and the office ( you can hardly tell I cleaned the office LOL) It's a working office with a business going on so it always looks like chaos.

So, Mark has the day off today. Fridays are usually half days during the summer but he took the morning off. So, at 7:51 am his phone rang. Is anybody really surprised? I was sleeping.

Hope everybody has a great day. Stay cool !


Tell a friend !


Jen said...

I've been going through a little something with my friends: several of them are moms and one works full-time and the other is taking 2 classes a semester (summers too) for 2 years to finish her Master's degree and get a job, after being out of the workforce for 6 years. And one friend has recently been diagnosed with lupus and she works like a maniac because her husband has health issues and doesn't have steady work or good health benefits. So I am given very little slack for my lifestyle and I truly feel misunderstood, like I'm home eating bon-bons and living it up. If I complain, I'm a whiner and everyone else has their problems, and if I sound like I'm doing well, then I'm fine and what am I doing slacking at home? No one gets all the complications of being on SSDI and trying to stay under the maximum so I don't lose my benefits (especially if I have another relapse that causes me to be out of work again.) Or that finding outside employment with afternoon hours (to accomodate my Betaseron hangovers and morning stiffness), that doesn't go over my maximum, and that is appealing to me--- I think I have a RIGHT to still pursue a career that I enjoy!---is like finding a needle in haystack.

I respect my friends' hectic lives, but I don't always feel that others respect us because unless we're rolling around in a scooter, it looks like we're fine. And I'm tired of it!!

Maybe I shoulda saved this for Joan's chat, but I just wanted to vent and be done with it. It felt good. Thanks for listening, Cathy.

Joan said...

Hi Cathy: YES, I have a "baseline" (word I stole from BrainCheese) which is crappy. Then I'm above or below baseline. When I say "I'm fine" it's usually to keep someone from worrying. But then they think I'm really "fine." Waaaaaa

When my husband was in the hospital, his daughter called the siblings and told them their dad was "fine." I said, "He's NOT fine, he's in the hospital!!"

We need a new language.

JEN: We can chat ourselves when it's not thundering if you need to talk. I understand EXACTLY what you mean and I need help working through this craziness, myself.